Community poll forum: Would you have done that to your daugther's laptop?

You do NOT have to even let her out of the house without being escorted by a parent. If you are with her all the time she can't get online. Taking away the laptop denotes the wrong message - it gives the child the impression that they will get it back. The gun was to ensure that the message was very clear - SHE IS NOT GETTING IT BACK. Parents should have the absolute right to full and unrestricted access to anything the kid does online and hold the social networking sites both civilly and criminally responsible if they let kids post private things.

I cna see a father's anger getting stronger and stronger as things piled up. We do not know how long this foolishness has been going on. He did not verbalize her language (left out the improper words that kids often use). He did not say if she had gotten other punishment at other times so to say his response was not needed would be not founded in any sort of proof. The only things that we should take from his actions are:
He seems to be under control.
He, as of his post, did not harm his daughter (slap, spank or other physical punishment)
He got rid of the weapon she was using against them - her laptop.
Now, will that stop her posting? - not likely. Will it stop her resentment? - It will probably give her more fuel to add to her fire. Will it resolve any issue? - Time will tell.
What would I do in his place? Not knowing what he did before I would start with taking the laptop out of her possession. Then comes many talks, daily; chores would increase. I might even pay her and then charge her for the use of our possessions, food, light, heat, room and bed, waste management - all the things which she takes for granted. No matter how it goes, it sounds like a case of "Tough Love" is needed.

I think shooting the laptop is a little extreme, but understandable. I did have a couple questions. Hannah is 15, does she get an allowance? What we did with our kids was give them chores to do and we also gave them an allowance. The allowance was not for doing chores, but to give them spending money so they wouldn't have to constantly come to us for everyday items.

Hannah is a teenager and posting a whine of FB is what teenagers do. She needs to be disciplined and a better solution would be to donate the laptop to charity and then have a long heart-to-heart talk with her. By shooting her laptop, posting it on her wall and youtube just lowered the father to her level--never a good idea.

I also understand that child protective services and the police has stopped by the house to see what the situation is like.

Ok, say you gave your kid money as an allowance. Just what do you think they will use it for?
Pop? Chips? Candy? Junk food? Well, by your doing that you not only add to the global epidemic of diabetes and obesity, you make them junk food junkies and have to keep giving and giving to support their habit. They can give the money to someone else (a gangsta for example) so they can afford more sophisticated criminal activity. I have seen this too. The kids will shake you down for all your worth.
People that live in the 'burbs need to come to the ghetto and live there for about 10 years or so. You will QUICKLY learn why things you thought were good actually are very bad.

I have read many of the responses and they provide some interesting ideas. If you have read or know about the "tiger mother" and the "french parenting" philosophies I think you find a common cord between them. Many American parents are afraid of upsetting their children thus we spoil them and fail to teach respect. This is a cultural item and not too many people are willing to buck the "culture". It used to be the parents " keeping up with the Joneses". Now it is the parents trying to "keeping their children ahead of the Joneses". If the adults chill out maybe the children will have a chance to chill out too. If you teach respect in a respectful way you will receive respect. I know, it is easy to preach, but, we have to start someplace.

Parents DO NOT have to give their kids any form of respect nor should be required to. The parents are in charge and that is final. Just like if you went before a judge. Judges NEVER give respect to anyone. They rule and you better knuckle down. The reason parents are afraid of their children is because the social services morons will put the parents through the hassle of their life if the kid whines to the wrong person. I have personally seen it happen to several parents I know. If it came to that I would tell them to keep my kid. Let THEM deal with the problems. My kid knows this. If they want to be part of our family then they know who is boss and it's not them. Parents are supposed to have absolute authority over their kids, not some social worker who is anti-testosterone motivated.

NOW!!!!! That makes alot of sense???!! To teach a teenager, when frustrated simply act upon it with death engaging violence and people wonder why there are deadly incidents happening in our schools,this behavior is not inherent, it is learned and a major contributor is the at home environment.

While I understand the sentiments and empathize with the father He has missed an opportunity to show a good example. Shooting a bit of hardware is a demonstration of lack of control. Guns as self defense perhaps but this? An inappropriate use of the weapon and a waste of equipment. Thumbs up if he'd stopped his rant before the shooting.

Uhhh.... could you put that in plain English please? I don't have a clue as to what you said in that post.

I love your post! I don't agree with taking it back or donating it. Shooting it is a final solution. The shock value alone will go a long way with the kid. Sometimes it is better to waste something now than to pay to repair problems later. I REALLY like the cultural thing you posted!

If the father is crazy enough to shoot the laptop, what, or who else will he shoot next.
Local Sheriff better watch this one.

That's a warning sign of trouble.

I would have shot that sucker too, but I would have used a shotgun and some buckshot. More dammage done that way.

... but this story just shows what owning a gun does to people. This is no way to resolve a conflict! What are you going to shoot next? The parking meter? The meter maid? Let me not go there!

This dad's reaction aside, what can we learn from the incident?

One: Putting it it in Facebook is telling the world. And I mean The World - that does indeed include dad! Never forget that, no matter how painful it is to get used to your sexual hormones when they first hit you. A youngish chap named Mark Zuckerberg is making ZILLIONS out of your need to run a diary in the public domain, but there was a reason why those old paper based "systems" had a little lock and key ...

Two: If you can't handle your offspring's criticism, don't listen in - this does not only apply to Facebook, by the way.

Three: Whatever happened to "count to ten before you react?" Right!

Four: If you are that trigger happy, rather don't own a gun, even in the "Land of the Free!" - Or, if you must assert your right to own one, keep it in the safe in your bank's vault. Then at least, if you use it they will be able to prove premeditated intent. Believe me, the world will be that much safer. One moment ago you were a perfectly legal gun owner, and then suddenly you are a felon.

In my adopted home country, South Africa (yeah!) we need to tell people that most victims of gun violence are the previous owners of a previous legal gun that started its carrer as an illegal gun when the attacker snatched it away from you only to kill you with it. Is that your idea of your right to self defense?

But this story - this story is about your own flesh and blood going through that painful experience called "growing up." We all did that, most of us eventually pulled through without shots being fired. Maybe it should be listed amongst all the other "unalienable rights" of every human, not just US citizens ...

As the father of 4 now grown children (Yea, I lived!), I can sympathize with the emotion, but he is only going to buy her another, after the tears and begging and the promises to change. Hope I'm wrong, but I don't think so.

Teenagers whine and rebel; it's part of adolescence, and I know I did too at that age. For a father to have a gun in his house and inappropriately use it to shoot his daughter's laptop shows me Dad might need to get a little help with his anger issues. If some free speech on Facebook created an extreme reaction like that, it sounds to me like Dad's the one who has issues with his emotions, not the daughter. This is why so many people favor gun control; the weapon's not being used for protection, it was being used for destruction. I wouldn't want to live in a house with a man like that who owned a gun; there's no telling what he'd do the next time he got angry.