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Spyware, viruses, & security : How do you keep your kids safe online?
- 4/2/07 2:22 PM
BSafe Online
by gnotellaluvr - 4/11/07 4:51 PM In reply to: How do you keep your kids safe online? by Lee Koo (ADMIN)
It costs money but it is one of the best products out there today. Install a small piece of software on your computer and begin customizing your white list. You can also have reporting setup to email a report to you.
Check it out: http://bsafehome.com/Default.aspx
You Can't Fix "Stupid"
by Goofy1 - 4/11/07 6:25 PM In reply to: How do you keep your kids safe online? by Lee Koo (ADMIN)
I have several kids at home. They range from a graduating Toddler to Drivers Age (shudder at that thought !!! ;-)) **lol**
I have found that realistically you can only do so much to help protect your kids while they are online these days.
And believe it or not, regardless of how sophisticated the Hardware/Software may be, it's always the stupidest things (typical actions without any thought behind it) that a kid can do that winds up circumventing all the "Control Measures" that you might have in place to protect them !
After trying ALL the available software out there, From Cybersitter on down the line to the tune of more than a few hundred dollars I found that the simplest solution was to take an old P2 computer that was relegated to being a doorstop and wiped the drives and loaded Linux Apache Server, Stuck in a few Network Cards, and presto !!!
Instant Router with more actual protection than anything else I found.
I have my DSL going directly into this resurected computer, with the kids, as well as my own computer going through it to the Net ...
By properly tweaking the NAT you have a firewall better than anything you can buy. That is just the beginning ... I have total control over what times of the day the kids computers can access the Net, as well as for how long, and the best feature .... actually being able to control WHERE on the net they can get to ...
Since I monitor this "router" routinely I can even tell if anyone out here in Cyberland was gutsy enough to try to follow any of my kids back home .... The only other software I use is the Firewall support that came installed in the DSL Modem from my ISP, and that pathetic XP firewall that came with the O/S from Microsoft, both of which would only slightly hinder a somewhat knowledgable person.
One question I get asked about more often from other parents about my home network is: "what about kids clicking links in their e-mail to places that are unsavory at best?"
Once again, totally controlable.
Remember, even if the kids use online e-mail like Yahoo or Hotmail, I have total control over what sites can download, as well as to which computers in our network it could get to...
Basically, for less cost than a mid-level priced cybersitter type of program, I can rest easy when my kids are online, even if I can't be in the same room with them to directly monitor them.
Something I overheard from one of my kids friends recently, told me I finally have a real handle on things.
First Friend talking: "Hey you have DSL ... I know a place on the Net we should check out. I got the URL from my brother in the military."
Second Friend with tone of disgust in voice: "Forget about using his net connection, he's lucky if he gets to see naked animals with it!"
First Friend: "OK ... Meet me in the Media Center during lunch at school tomorrow .... I know we can check out the website with those computers !!! "
Safe from What?
by R41 - 4/11/07 6:36 PM In reply to: How do you keep your kids safe online? by Lee Koo (ADMIN)
A friend was telling me about his vacation in Greece. "At some of the beaches there, men and women go completely naked, and this bothered my son." I asked, "Did he get brain damage or anything?" "No, he just became curious about a lot of things."
My own son, back in the days before internet, used to call BBS computers. Based on the images we found on the hard drive, he has some very weird ideas about where babies come from. Perhaps, now that he is married, his new wife can straighten him out on that. (I dare not post the graphic details.)
There is no good purpose served by taking any of this seriously. Young minds can adjust to a wide range of inputs.
No need for those security programs
by uranai - 4/11/07 6:37 PM In reply to: How do you keep your kids safe online? by Lee Koo (ADMIN)
Relying on software, hardware, or physical presence to "protect" your kids from the "evil threats of the net" is ridiculous.
Being online is not different from a life offline. Of course there are criminals, rapers, kidnappers, robbers; there are natural disasters like earthquakes and tornados; there are accidents like car crashes and fire; there are bullies at school that may take your kid's lunch money; a lot of cruel people and dangerous situation you would not like to have anything to do with your children, however, you don't hire a bunch of armed bodyguards to follow them 24/7.
What you do (or must do) is talk to them, saying things like "never get into a stranger's car", or "don't walk alone at night", and "never tell a strager your address". And that's the same thing you should do regarding online stuff. Discuss with your kids what are the real threats and what they must do. A stranger in MSN trying to send you this "New game.exe"? Just tell the no. No need to block every download.
Furthermore, those pesky net-watching programs (as was previuosly posted) never work as they say. When I was 14, me and my buddy always find how to de-activate the "/·/$·()"/! net-nanny to do our stuff. Sometimes it was as easy as just spying and getting the password, sometimes we had to boot to safe mode, then modify the registry to prevent the program form loading. The "tighter" the security program was, the more dangerous our solution was.
Parents should also be aware of what the real threats of internet are. Is a 15 year old watching porn "dangerous"??? Hell no. Its natural. All those hormones and the eager to learn. Its better to watch some naugthy pics than doing naughty (and potentially dangerous) stuff in real life. (though that is topic for another type of thread).
Not many years have passed since I had to struggle with those kind of pesky, exaggerated mesaures, and I always found a way to get around them. Considering that kids these days have more experience with computers than I had, I think most of them will be able to get around today's "security" measures too.
The real solution to the real problems is to teach your kids (specially teenagers) how to avoid them and how to solve them, just like you would in real life. Not point in putting them inside a "golden cage".
slight aside....
by loach66 - 4/11/07 7:17 PM In reply to: No need for those security programs by uranaiBold statement uranai. And i agree 100%
You cannot delegate your responsibility as a parent. The best defense against predators online is communication with your child. They have to understand what is right behavior and what is wrong behavior. And if you have to battle with your child, that would indicate that the battle is already lost. These things, these lines of communication, are formulated from the earliest days of communicating with your toddler. There can be no conflict if you make them truly understand the difference between what is ok/fun and harmful. How could there be conflict? They were "tabula rasa", you wrote their personality.
To those who say you don't know what your saying, kid's will be kids, i have four..20 18 6 and 9 months, and this has worked for me.
lol funny.......
by crazyivan_3 - 4/11/07 7:44 PM In reply to: slight aside.... by loach66Being in my mid 20's, I remember all the software parents and the school's "put" to keep out porn, Napster...before the RIAA kicked in with all the law suits, and other things from entering... One of the easies way to bypass it was with a proxy server. And guess what... got all the porn my little 15 year old heart wanted without getting caught.. If a 15 year old in '97 could do it, what makes you think kids now wont be able to??
Good point but...
by 22LaLa - 4/11/07 10:06 PM In reply to: lol funny....... by crazyivan_3...ten long years ago on the internet you couldn't get the streaming video content you get now. So when my 12 year old clicks on "hot babes" spam and suddenly is looking at a violent porn video, he is more upset than I am. Somehow, I doubt you were downloading stuff that gruesome.
It will be another world again in ten more years when your daughter is 12. (What you could do at 15, she will be able to do at 12). I wonder if you have a plan for how she can explore the internet knowing that you will not be able to protect her from content that my offend you?
The difference is you wanted to find it.
by tmccool - 4/12/07 5:23 AM In reply to: lol funny....... by crazyivan_3CrazyIvan, you wanted to see porn, so you found a way to get to it. Years ago, parents didn't keep porn magazines in their home, but Johnny went to his friend's house and looked at big brother's Playboy, if that's what he had to do. If a kid wants to see porn, he will find it, and it's indicative of a different problem regardless of the Internet. What the software protects is children who don't want to see porn.
response...
by Recneps57 - 4/12/07 1:53 PM In reply to: The difference is you wanted to find it. by tmccoolthis is in response to 'the difference is you wanted to find it'. regardless of how innocent a child is, or how nice you think they are, or how amazing they are... they will look at porn. not 1 male that graduates high school today has not had an encounter with pornography, i'm not trying to say all male kids are bad, i'm not bad lol. i'm just saying, they will get into it, and unless you talk with them and tell them how dangerous and harmful this is to them, they can go extremely overboard, any porn is bad, but more is worse. pornography is one of the most addictive, if not the most addictive, yes that's right, even crack could be less addictive than this crap, things in the world. if the awareness of parents to help their children, or anyone to help children understand the dangers of this, the problem will simply grow and grow, and more people will become addicted and lose their lives to it.
Not only 15 year olds use computers!
by yukiuk - 4/12/07 3:18 PM In reply to: No need for those security programs by uranaiGeez, so many of you are missing the point. Not only 15 and 16 year olds use computers and surf the net. What about the 8, 9 and 10 year olds? Don't tell me they are too young, maybe they are but regardless it's a fact of life. They are the ones who need protecting from UNWANTED and UNINVITED nasties. By the time a child is 15 or 16 the parents job has pretty much been done and their responses to certain situations will generally be dictated by how well (or badly) that job was done. I agree, in the main, that if children of this age want to view porn or nudity they will, one way or another. But don't forget the innocents who haven't been tainted and DON'T want to see this crap.
P.S. I am a father of 5 and have 14 grandchildren.
Regards JIMBO
Don't give up
by jbusti - 4/13/07 6:40 PM In reply to: No need for those security programs by uranaiThe problems that pornography can create are well documented. The fact that some kids will try harder than others to get through protection schemes does not mean we as parents give up.
That is a fundamental principle of parenting.
How to Keep You Kids Safe
by Beaters - 4/11/07 8:14 PM In reply to: How do you keep your kids safe online? by Lee Koo (ADMIN)
I take a different tack: I just taught them not to be suckers from an early age. "Don't be a chump" was friendly, parental advice offered early on. My kids had no filters, no parental hovering. What they had was straight talk about life and the low-lifes to be encountered on- and off-line. My kids grew up to have have good radar for spotting cons of all sorts.
As for on-line porn, which seems to concern so many parents: I taught my kids that it's basically a waste of time and energy. I taught them that porn presents an unrealistic viewpoint on human sexuality. I figured they're going to check it out anyhow. So, why not just tell a truth: that it's damned stupid as a rule? That was a lot easier than trying to micro-manage their lives or going off an a moralistic sermon that they'd just disregard anyhow. None of my kids has a porn habit. I wound up pretty credible in the end, too.
Caveat: if your kid(s) is too dumb to learn how to spot sketchy situations, probably best keep an eagle eye on him/her.
Accountability Software to track internet activity.
by 02befree - 4/11/07 8:30 PM In reply to: How do you keep your kids safe online? by Lee Koo (ADMIN)
I tried Covenant Eyes which is a service that tracks internet site activity on a specific computer and then emails the results to two people. The reports are very detailed and web sites visited are scored for content. The theory is that if a child knows his dad and his favorite aunt are getting a report of his internet activity every month, he'll think twice about where he goes. We like it and it's simple and about 7 bucks a month. http://www.covenanteyes.com/
Predators I have encountered online...
by 22LaLa - 4/11/07 8:46 PM In reply to: How do you keep your kids safe online? by Lee Koo (ADMIN)
I attended a presentation for parents on online safety for children. The presenter was a Northern California police officer who works undercover online posing as a 13 year old girl. He has caught hundreds of predators this way, stopped them from meeting kids in person and put many in jail (where I hope they will stay)! To demonstrate, our presenter logged on to an AOL chat room in his 13 year old girl disguise. It took only 34 SECONDS before he got his first contact: a 47 year old man who was real friendly and kept remarking about all "her" cute pics. Within another one minute there were so many conversations on screen that the police officer could barely keep up with all the chatting! I was not surprised to see all this, but at the same time, it was really creepy.
You can use software that is being suggested on this thread but I also strongly urge you to talk with your children about this issue. They need to know what you are doing to keep them safe and why. The goal is to make the internet safe for your children to wander around in, the same way you make the rest of the world safe for them to explore. As they get older they can learn (with your help) to handle the more adult parts of the internet on their own. But you wouldn't just let your 6 to 12 year old surf without guidelines and protection anymore than you would drop them off on a corner in downtown LA for the afternoon.
I wish I'd been there!
by GSFran - 4/13/07 2:20 AM In reply to: Predators I have encountered online... by 22LaLaI remember back in 1999 when that trick was first taught to law enforcement. (A demonstration in Nassau County, New York, caught a doctor - someone who can be trusted! - with guns and child porn in his vehicle.) It's been at least eight years; why aren't parents across the country shown how easy it can be for predators?
I'm in the process of seeing if local police would be willing to show me enough to do demonstrations, without breaking the law, at community centers. This has been a topic close to my heart for the past ten years and I only wish I could find someone in law enforcement who needed a secretary, so that I could use the skills that I have to help someone who is making a difference, here.
Great post - thanks!
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